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Monday, December 31, 2012

宁可过没有女人的日子

It's been a while since I write a post in mandarin, this whole idea pop out by the time I'm eating a delicious meal few days ago.

I would like to apologize for my readers who don't understand mandarin, I'm too lazy to translate the whole post into English, it took me few days to complete this whole thing.

If you really really interested to read it, try the google translate.

I read the translation by google and I got no idea what they had translated. Lol!



Anyhow, I wish to greet my fellow readers a very highly deeply greatly ultimately...



HAPPY NEW YEAR 2013!

You survive the legendary apocalypse of 2012 and you deserve a better life in 2013!

Live it to the fullest!

And so, enjoy my story below and have a smile for this new year :)

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有天,我走进了一家门庭若市的烧腊店,稳如泰山的坐在椅子上对着伙计说道:“来道烧肉加叉烧,加大加料加timun!“

Uploaded from the Photobucket iPhone App

片刻之后,只见大厨拿着大刀在肥美油腻的叉烧和烧肉上连连的无情斩杀,那冷酷无情的表情不禁让我不寒而栗。

伙计把完美的加料叉烧烧肉放在我的面前。

Uploaded from the Photobucket iPhone App

我的眼望着这盘烧腊,我那巧克力肤色般的脸颊凡起了醺红,望着这盘料理而不自然害羞起来.

心里不自觉地犹如初恋般的小鹿乱撞.

喉咙中卡着的:"我爱你." 怎么努力也说不出来.

初恋就是这样.

爱,但是怕受伤害,即使再爱,也说不出口,所以行成了一生难忘的遗憾.

短短的时间里,顿时心里百感交极.

一番欣赏之后决定把一块烧肉缓缓的放进嘴里,烧肉接近的时候眼睛不经意的般咪了起来,犹如要跟恋人接吻般的情形。

在咬下去的0.01秒,我的嘴里绽放了无数的烟花,每一个咀嚼都爆发了美丽无比的灿烂烟花,那脆脆的皮和肥瘦适中的三层肉,简直三万支笔十公升的墨都难以形容。

享受了烧肉,是时候跟叉烧缠绵了。

用叉子插着小心的把叉烧送进嘴里,一定要小心,不可以掉了,千万不可以。

话说十年前由于疏忽把叉烧掉在地板上,那份遗憾感一直像利器般插在心里,那个要吃但吃不到的心情,有谁人能理解?

如果它是这世纪唯一最好吃的叉烧,我对得起它吗?

因为我那该死的手把它给掉了,害我不能吃到它,到今天我还是一直后悔和念念不忘,都是你,手,都是你的错,我恨你,我今晚就算怎么欲火焚身都不会再用你了。

回到刚才叉烧的故事,刚刚放进去的时候。。。

我的舌头高潮了。

什么啊?这什么啊?这什么味道啊?

那个肥腻的油在我舌头即刻溶化,再来就是那块瘦肉有如调情高手的跟我舌头鱼水交欢,简直高潮连连,湿了再湿。

刹那间,我对猪的存在感到万分的感激。

因为有了猪,才有了肉骨茶,烧肉,叉烧烧腊,kolok mee,kueh chap,东波肉,鲁肉等等。

猪的贡献简直高过我们的领导人,没有猪肉就没有 肉骨茶,烧肉叉,烧烧腊,kolok mee,kueh chap,东波肉,鲁肉等等。

没有肉骨茶,烧肉叉,烧烧腊,kolok mee,kueh chap,东波肉,鲁肉等等的世界还算是世界吗?还可以住人吗?

下世投胎的话, 如果投胎成淋在烧肉上面的辣椒酱或酱油汁,有了对烧肉点点的贡献也在所不惜阿!

在对猪肉有所领悟的同时,我细噘慢嚼得享受着剩下来的极品。

忽然,有个微胖的小伙子,狼吞虎咽的吃相严重的干扰到我的胃口,在他吃到最后一片烧肉的时候,他把筷子放下,摸摸肚腩,举起跟我大腿一样粗的手臂叫伙记买单.

我望着那片孤伶伶的烧肉,内心里面燃烧出无限的愤怒,岂有此理!

这世界上何等小人可以这么浪费好吃的烧肉!

浪费好吃的烧肉同等侮辱猪肉!

侮辱猪肉同等侮辱可爱的猪猪。

侮辱可爱的猪猪同等侮辱我!

心里为这烧肉心里打抱不平.

人说眼睛有神,就是所谓的眼神.

我用我帅气的眼神使出充满杀气的刺人光芒来怒瞪着他.

顿时他的眼睛与我直视,感到不知所措.

旁人给我耀眼的杀气眼神深深的吸引,紧张的气氛让旁人都停下了餐饮,个个都望着我和小伙子的眼神交战.

在一个小小的咖啡厅里,顿时全部鸦雀无声.

时间犹如停止流动般,全部凝结成冰.

过了度秒如年的三十点零七秒,小伙子举起颤抖的手,抓着那块完美无缺的烧肉,送进自己的血盆大口.

小伙子快速的还了钱,经过我的时候,说了声:"对不起."

泪奔飞快的跑出店外.

顿时掌声犹如雷声般的响起,掌声丝毫不输给阿鸡哥的七十人粉丝会.

Uploaded from the Photobucket iPhone App

大家都为了我的正义自动的起身拍手.

隔壁的一个女孩跑过来跟我要了签名,说现今的人心冷漠的社会还会出现这样的英雄,实在了不得。

我在纸巾上签了大名后对她说:“记得,以后不可以浪费食物。”

我感到无比的快乐,老师教导我们要日行一善,我这善举少少都可以顶三十天.

我今天为了帮到的烧肉感到无比光荣.

要不是我,这片烧肉可能被倒进垃圾桶,慢慢的被折磨而痛苦并腐烂.

Dre大人在"失戀復健指南"里面说了一句感人肺腑的名言:“失戀並不會使人成長,吃飯才會使人成長",确实如此,句句真言,一点都没有错,经过了一顿加料叉烧烧肉饭,肚子确实长大不少。

历史悠久的中华文化里也流传着一句名句:"宁可过没有女人的日子,也不能过没有猪肉的日子."

今天的我,深深的体会到了.

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恩,看完了,没有了.

笑一个吧。

Cheers.

-closedown-

Thursday, December 27, 2012

I like U

Good day, everyone.

I discovered IU in running man's episodes.



I was wondering who is this cute girl and I never notice her before. She sings pretty nice in there so I searched her MV in youtube.


IU(아이유) _ YOU&I(너랑 나) (Performance ver.)

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As soon as I finish her MV, I puked rainbow for the first time in my life.

That dance, is the second cutest thing in the world after fluffy cat.

No one can ever beat cat's cuteness.

I introduce to one of my friend and he immediately fall in love with her.

He got this symptom which we can't fall to sleep without watching her MVs.

After that, I watch her "Good Day" MV and fall in love to this song too.


IU (아이유) _ Good Day (좋은 날) _ MV

But that high pitch notes in the end, seems legit.

Is it autotune?

Usually if I like a music video of certain artists like SNSD or 4minute, I will search for their live performance, live performance is the best way to proof an artist's true talent, they can't fake it.


[Live HD 720p] 120525 - IU - Good day - Yoo Hee Yeol's Sketchbook

And I puked second rainbow of my life.

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She did it in live performance!

She is too much way talented, it's not overrated for them to call her young Diva.

I like Hyuna when I just knew her, but she turns me down after I watch her live performance, she can't even lip sync properly. I just think she disrespect the audiences.

If an artist can't even sing while dance at the same time, you only do the dancing part for the whole performance, what's the difference between yourself and the other dancers?

Anywhere, IU cheers me up every time I watch her MV. *love*

Enjoy and let's puke some more rainbows.

-closedown-

Thursday, December 20, 2012

Apocalypse 21.12.2012

I'm going to write a quick post since I'm very busy in works lately.

I'm really busy; busy means I got a job; Job means I got salary; Got salary means I can survive! Yeah!

Anywhere, I'm actually hoping that something will happen on 21.12.2012.

I'm kinda disappointed that today 20.12.2012 is like another normal day, no natural disaster or supernatural thing or UFO means that tomorrow will be another ordinary day.

It's not that my life is fucked up and I want this world to be ended.

It's just that I foresee my life for the next 30 years.

Work eat sleep work eat sleep work eat sleep work eat sleep work eat sleep work eat sleep work eat sleep, live in this monetary system which makes all of us as a slave of money.

Life has been fun before working life when I had no worries in study life. All I need to do is study, making friends and have fun. Everyday is a challenging day with new things around me.

Now my life is kinda stuck, I live basically same routine for everyday. I can't quit my jobs, I can't live a jobless life, can't really pursue for what I really want or dreams of, it's like my life is fixed for the rest of my life.

Next step of my life is to build a family which I think it's even worse for me. Once I have a children, basically my life is fixed. I can't hide or run to anywhere. I need to work until fricking old just to feed them.

Don't worry, I'm not depressed, I'm a happy and optimistic person.

I'm just blaming this monetary system based society which creates a vortex of loans for us to live in.

That's why I'm actually hoping for something to happen tomorrow so that I can live a different life. I don't care I live or dead, if I'm dead it's my luck, if I live, I will have a new challenge for my life.

Ok, enough of nagging and the next post will be something funny again. Wait for it :p

I will have a short break starting tomorrow and see you guys around after a week.

Stay alive, my fellow readers!

Grumpy Cat and I have a message for you all.

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Exactly. Merry Kissmyass!

Cheers and have a nice holiday.

-closedown-

Friday, December 14, 2012

KPOP Girls

Today's topic, as above.

Because of Gangnam Style, I start to follow KPOP.



First of all, this is HYUNA without eyebrows and pikachu voice in her oppa gangnam MV. XD

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Pika pika!

Later on, I found out she doesn't look as cute as that in her older MVs.

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In fact, she sells a lot of her sexy appearance. She knows how to do it.

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That seduce look @.@

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I also found out that Keryn and Bev ever dance with her songs, I just know that.

And because of Hyuna, I started to watch 4minute's MVs which is pretty attractive. My favourite MV of theirs are "Love Tension", "Ready Go" and "I My Me Mine".

I love to see them dance, a complete different style from SNSD.

There's one period that I have to watch their MVs before sleep, I believe everybody loves to watch pretty girl dance.

Once I hit play, there's no way I can stop the MV, my soul is possessed by them at that moment 0.0

However, I still prefer to watch SNSD's MVs due to the their smiles. Looking at them dance with smiles on their faces brings sunshine to me.

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They smile a lot in their MVs compare to T-ARA, I dislike T-ARA.

I have this problem which I can't remember their names, there's too many things for me to remember.

However, I have my favourite members in the KPOP single/groups but I will only explain my reason in one word to avoid flames from KPOP fans.

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4minute

No. 3 - Pretty

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No. 2 - Attractive

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No.1 - Unique

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Yeap, Hyuna is not in my list.

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SNSD

No.3 - Gorgeous

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No.2 - Lovely

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No.1 - Princess

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Secret

No. 1 - Sizzling-Hot

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BoA •❤•

My-All-Time-Favourit-Angel •❤•

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And recently, I fall in love to IU but I will write a post about her next time.

That's all for today and happy weekend.

Cheers.

-closedown-

Friday, December 07, 2012

Life of Pi 3D

I love this movie, I give it a 9/10 and a title of "Best movie in 2012".



I watch it in 3D because I have no choice, anyway watch it in normal or 2D is more than enough.

I want to cry with Pi too when Richard Parker left him without looking back.

I was like...

Nuuuuuuuuuuuuu..........

Richard Parker don't go!!!

He's your best companion in your life and you should at least say thank you before you leave.

Richard Parker Nuuuuuuuuuuuuu..........


-closedown

Thursday, December 06, 2012

Boobie Distraction

Damn! I can't focus on the magic!



The boobie distraction IS TOO DAMN HIGH!

However, how did he do that???



And where did he hide the croissant and fricking long baguette???

Does he has somekind of portal behind his hand?

Nuuuuuuu..........



And this?! I had a goosebumps after watch the coin teleportation!

It's impossibruuuu!!!

I'm totally mindfucked.



100% success rate of getting a girlfriend.

Teach me please, master!

P/S: For more of his awesome videos, go here.

-closedown-

Wednesday, December 05, 2012

Ghost Tits Trailer

This epic trailer is so fricking intense.



It's so scary yet so hilarious at the same time.

Imaginary... tits.

They are listening.

Cheers.

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MomoJoJo Community Care News

This happened in KL and I hope no people will ever scam by this again.

I can't believe a girl can believe a stranger so easily and get on his car alone.

This society is so sick and dangerous. Luckily she lost nothing else but her phone. Worst case can happen if rapist or kidnapper learn this tactic.

Read the detail here.

-closedown-

Tuesday, December 04, 2012

Song of December


Ed Sheeran - Lego House

Lyric here.

Cheers. ✿(。◕‿◕。)✿

-closedown-

Saturday, December 01, 2012

Mei Tu Xiu Xiu is HORRIBLE

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Mei tu xiu xiu is HORRIBLE because it made me look FABULOUS!

P.S.: If you don't know why I make this, read this.

P.S. 2: If you don't know who the clone is, go here.

Happy weekend! Kay bye. :)

-closedown-

Friday, November 30, 2012

Back from Holiday

Hey guys and girls, I'm back after a week of holiday.

To kill your boredom, here is an AWESOME magic trick you should learn.



It works like a charm. Try it.

Cheers.

P/S: Going to watch Wreck-It Ralph, Life of Pi and Rise of the Guardians. Rating so damn good~


-closedown-

Friday, November 23, 2012

Paranormal Activity 4

JoJo rate this movie 5/10.

Surprisingly, I follow this movie series until forth release even it isn't so nice compare to other epic movies.

I hate to watch horror movie in cinema, because I need to act tough but my heart is dying throughout the play of the horror movie.

However, this movie didn't scare me at all. It's funnier to see others react, jumping, screaming, but I feel nothing.

Even this movie is much more scarier than PA4...



Seriously, Insidious is scary as fuck.

The purpose of writing this post isn't about PA4, but it's about the conversation between my colleagues after that movie and also one of my self experience during secondary school time which I never tell anyone in my life.

Well, I don't recommend you to read if you are afraid of ghost stories or staying alone, the less you know about these stories, the less you afraid of the dark or dolls on your bed.

To prevent someone who dislikes this kind of stories continue to read it out of curiosity, I hide the rest in Read More section...

One of my Malay friend was talking about his brother's story...

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Ji Pai Mei

This Ji Pai MM is so so so adorable.



I just spent my precious 12 minutes time on this video.

I don't know what's she talking about, but I just stare at her face all the time (not in a creepy way, with one hand on keyboard, the other on mouse) 0.o

She's pretty isn't it?



How can a guy resists a video of pretty cutie face with that boobs 0.0

-closedown-

Monday, November 19, 2012

Some old photos of my best friends back in 2006

Flip back to my 2006 photos folder and found this.

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Wilson is one of the narcissism I have ever met.

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He always have this "Bitch please, I'm fabulous" pattern.

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He did look like 朱孝天 right?

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DID!

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Wilson, Y U LOOKED SO HANDSOME THAT TIME?

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I don't know why but he took a lot of pictures with my handphone.

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Which gives me the chance to post a lot of his photos in this post today.

The only reunion among this group of best friends had since our brotherhood time was during 2006.

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Beaches, we love beaches.

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We played "Truth or Dare" in the night time but James didn't get involved, he pretended to sleep but he giggled while we revealed our truth.

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He must got lots of dark secrets which can't be shared.

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Yun May, he got a lot of dark secrets.

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I remember Fui asked me an epic question after I lost a bet.

你...

你有...

你有榨...

你有榨过...

你有榨过XX...

你有榨过XX的...

你有榨过XX的nen...

你有榨过XX的nen吗?

你有榨过XX的nen吗???

We all burst in laughter after he asked me that question, I still have that video in my phone.

Fui, well done, well done.

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Oh, here Wilson with my phone again.

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Enough is enough.

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I stole your first kiss before Karen did.

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True friends are harder to find when we grown up.

"Friends" nowadays, either want your money or will stab your back anytime.

I realized that no matter what happens in a good or bad way, my friends are the very few people that always support me.

Once, I blamed @ because of some idiotic misunderstanding but he didn't keep it in heart.

Even though % always curses my relationship by asking whether I break up already or not,  but he will be a helpful friend anytime. Once, he helped me to push my dead battery car in the middle of night, can't forget about this.

One of the wise man, * always gave me lots of wise words whenever I'm lost.

Now, all of my best friends fly out from Kuching except Wilson.

Dude, when want to have another reunion again?

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Our favourite quotes of the night while facing to the big dark ocean:
1. "Wei Shen Me???!!!!"
2. "Hou hui plus yi han!!!!"

ROFL! Cb James.

-closedown-

Friday, November 16, 2012

Acoustic Cover


Taylor Swift - We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together (Boyce Avenue & Hannah Trigwell) on iTunes

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好好听~好听到要哭>.<

-closedown-

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

2006 vs 2012

6 years ago, we were having a small friends reunion.

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3 of us did look slim and young. :p

Wilson has the longest hair.

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Ping ping looked so pure and innocent that time.

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6 years had passed, in the blink of an eye.

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If you look closely, you will notice someone will level up soon.

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And Fui, your spirit is always with us.

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6 years had gone, I'm still look young and handsome.

Muahahahahaaa.

Cheers.

-closedown-